Friday, September 23, 2011
Be, Do, Have
Have you ever seen this image? I hadn't before Monday when our Weight Watchers leader drew it on the board. Now I have to admit my attention was divided between what she was sharing and my son throwing cereal on the floor so I may have missed some key points, but, let me give it a whirl.
After a quick internet search I discovered the "Be Do Have" model is used in many different self improvement arenas. Basically the point is to visualize what or who you would like to be, do the things that person would do and have the results that person would have. I think it is a really neat tool.
Isn't it easy to sit around and think about who we could be if only we could have different things. We would have more money if we had a different job, we would go more places if only we had a better car, we would be tidier if only we had a nicer house to keep clean or we would wear nicer clothes if we had a better body to dress. If only we had these or any number of other things, then we could finally stop rushing and fighting with life and just be happy.
Remember when all the buzz was about "The Secret"? Just tell the universe what you want and if you really want it things will begin to go your way. There was a scene in the movie where one of the narrators talks about going to the mailbox day after day only to have more bills appear. He started to visualize money and suddenly there were checks and no bills. Here is my conclusion. While this person was telling "the universe" what he wanted he was thinking more about what he wanted to become and started to act like that person. I think he may have been a writer. He probably started sending out articles, meeting with publishers, revamping previous projects and low and behold it began to yield results! I don't doubt that he was working before the visualization but when he started thinking about how to have money by being a writer he began to do more about it.
The real secret is action with a goal.
You can spend a day, week or year visualizing and telling the universe whatever you want but unless you get up and take action it is highly unlikely any amazing change will come into your life. (I never say never though, just in case) You can also be going and going trying to do things that you are supposed to but if you don't know what your goal is all your efforts may wind up being a lot of wasted energy.
Bringing the idea back to diet and exercise.
At the same Weight Watchers meeting my husband shared that he feels like he holds himself back because he wants to have all the right gear or gadgets before he can engage in an activity. This seems to me like a common trap. Do you need to have running shoes to be a runner, a roasting pan to cook a chicken, a nicer car to be on time to work or your dream house to pick out furniture you love? Imagine for a moment that you will never have the thing you think you need. Think about it. Now what?
I am absolutely guilty of this behavior myself. When I started going to the YMCA on a regular basis I really wanted to say that I couldn't get in a good workout because my sweats were not right and my shoes were worn out. Then I stopped and thought about how dumb that would sound to me if I heard someone else say these things. So I started working out and after a few weeks I did begin to upgrade my athletic gear but only after I built a habit of going to the gym. It turned out getting started just took me making the effort and following through again and again. My shoes were fine and my baggy sweats still allowed me full range of motion on the equipment.
I do not disagree that some activities require specific tools. If you have a boat but no oars it would not be wise to push out into a lake. My point is if you look out the window and think, "it's a beautiful day to be out on a boat, but I have no boat," it will still be a beautiful day and you can still spend time outside.
Here's the flip side to the coin. Raise your hand if you or someone you know owns exercise equipment. Keep your hand raised if the equipment is used as an extension of your closet or a layer of dust on it. I am guessing there are a large number of hands raised. We have a treadmill and I actually use it, occasionally. See the thing is just having things does not get me any closer to my goal. I have to be in the mindset of using the treadmill. I really enjoy going to the Y so when I use the treadmill I feel like I am cheating on the gym. (please don't tell me I am alone in my wackiness) When I don't use the gym or the treadmill neither is doing me any good.
The visual of the triangle will be really helpful to me. As I make choices and changes I can set a goal to be different, imagine what I would like to have, and plan what I need to do to achieve the goal. Simple and hopefully effective.